Tonight, Bravo aired the epic three-part reunion special of their booming The Real Housewives of New York City series (which originally aired on three different nights over the last week) back to back to back. Yes, I sat and watched every single part, back to back to back. I won't lie - I throughly enjoy the show. It's absurd and ridiculous in its soap-like drama, but these women also show some truly heartwarming moments. It's the perfect guilty pleasure, the show is an addictive blast. Possibly the best moment of the reunion was the clip reel of one-liners and "bloopers" from the season, touching upon some hilarious metaphors (thanks, Ramona and Kelly!).
The objective of this post is not to recap the brutal arguments, or true intentions, from the reunion's three hours (you'd have to be a fan to understand most of the heated conversations), but in part two of the special, and into part three, the women revealed something fascinating in their bickering. Ex-besties Bethenny Frankel (my favorite of the bunch, now with her spin-off Bethenny Getting Married?) and Jill Zarin got into an emotional debate about their friendship falling apart (*falling apart = crashing and burning) this season; this season was much darker than past years, filled with even more hateful chatter and malicious actions. However, this heightened drama is exactly what viewers are gobbling up. During this debate, with the death of their friendship as the dramatic core from this season, Bethenny brought up an interesting point, a point that I believe touches upon a notion that resonates throughout all of reality television: Jill was more than ready to show her husband's cancer diagnosis on the show, but did not want the cameras rolling when Bethenny asked to step into a room and work on mending their friendship. Bethenny was later asked about when two woman on the show called her a "fame whore," citing the fact that she had the cameras in the bathroom while taking a pregnancy test; she said she certainly draws a line at showing certain things, but that the moment with her pregnancy test didn't bother her at all.
Bethenny inadvertently touched upon a much bigger question within reality television - where do you draw the line on what to show from your life on television? When is the footage no longer entertainment, but something far too real, and perhaps downright frightening? New addition to the cast Sonja Morgan (a wonderful source of comedic relief throughout the entire season, and a breath of fresh air when she entered the reunion's second hour) described how she did not want her daughter featured on the show, while (Countess) LuAnn de Lesseps talked about leaving certain details of her personal life (specifically the details surrounding her divorce) private. Reality stars subject their entire lives to the camera, with an audience always been there to watch the torrid details of their lives. However, putting a camera crew in the room automatically destroys the element of "reality." No one's reality involves have a camera documenting their every action; adding a camera to the equation often changes people, causing them to act out in ways that could be extremely unexpected. One reason I hate the New Jersey entry to this franchise is for this reason exactly; I believe those women are chewing scenery to simple cause a scene, trying to one-up each other in front of the camera, and it is disgusting. Could these actions on television not be reality, but people portraying caricatures of themselves? It's an interesting shift to note, the subtle (or not-so-subtle) changes in a person when they know there's an large audience hanging on their every word.
We gobble up reality television: Bravo begins Real Housewives of DC this August, as the franchise continues to expand, and Bethenny Getting Married? premiered to just over two million viewers two weeks ago, the highest rated series debut ever on Bravo. We treat the show like entertainment; believe me, I find the show ridiculous entertaining, and will continue to watch as long as the New York ladies are around. However, reality television peers directly into the private lives of others. It is a blatant form of exploitation, even if those participating have signed off on their lives being filmed. Part of the show's guilty pleasure is beyond just feeling guilty for watching the show; it is also the feeling that it is objectionable to watching moments of another's life that are usually so private (for example, Bethenny dealing with the intense emotions of visiting her biological father's deathbed). Television producers tap into the drama that people hunger for, drama that seems so much stronger when it is happening to real people. If television producers don't always draw the line of what should be show, is it our responsibility to turn away?
The question of crossing this line was actively explored in this season - Kelly Killoren Bensimon had a rather frightening mental breakdown during the "Scary Island" vacation (Housewives-penned nickname), which left the woman she was with extremely rattled; they were very concerned with the woman's health, and she left the island the next morning. However, during the reunion, Kelly labeled the moment as a "breakthrough," and disagreed with moments that were irrefutable facts. For a while (the end of hour two, into the beginning of the final hour), the reunion was not entertaining, but nearly depressing; this was a woman who clearly needed help, a woman lost in her own world. She honestly believes the lies coming out of her mouth, every single word; some of the things she said were so utterly ridiculous, even reunion host Andy Cohen couldn't hide his astonishment. Seeing her breakdown on the show, and her blatant denial that there was any kind of problem during the reunion, was horrifying. This woman needs help.
Also in the reunion, Jill seemed to be paying for her sins over the past season, and was many times overcome with emotion over the statements hurled at her; even Bethenny made a comment about how they might as well murder the woman right there, seeing what was being said to her in emails and questions sent in by viewers. It was a painful experience, seeing this woman so beaten down, in tears, and emotionally lost; who knows the full truth on what is going on between her and Bethenny, but I felt her pain when she could no longer hold it together. From what we've seen on the show, she has become a sad, bitter, twisted version of her former self... but no one should have to deal with that much hate. It was, again, difficult to watch this woman scramble to reassemble the relationships she had.
I don't have answers to the questionings I'm positing here, or an answer for when I keep the show on when these horrible moments happen. I'm not sure solid answers exist. I did think it was interesting to see that in the reunion alone, the women expressed strong traits they have shown as vital parts of their personality throughout the show - Bethenny was brutally honest and, as always, downright hilarious (calling Kelly Humpty Dumpty = priceless); Sonja was trustworthy and ridiculously level-headed, proving again that it's always good to laugh at yourself, and that Bravo made one of the best moves in the show's run by getting this woman, so comfortable and confident in herself, on camera; LuAnn (you've seen the Money Can't Buy You Class video, right?!!) acted as a mediator, diplomatic while attempting to stay out of the heart of the drama (I was surprised to hear her incredibly moving and frank words about her divorce - this woman does have class); Ramona's lovable crazy, and in my eyes, the "Mom" of the group; and so on. It was almost as if reality television has the ability to strip people down to their very core, showing their true personality when throw into a situation.
A line does exist of what should be shown on television, of what is actual entertainment, and of what is healthy for the public to watch. Maybe the fact that I didn't change the channel during the reunion's rough moments speaks volumes. Maybe I'm being hypocritical! Maybe there's something we can't deny in watching these difficult moments of struggle, an aspect in all people that reality television has learned to deeply affect. Maybe we realize that the problems in our lives really aren't that awful when compared to the outrageous things these women go through, and put themselves through; the show acts as a reminder that no matter how much money you have or where you live, someone out there with the "perfect life" is dealing with something more outrageous than you can imagine. It's almost therapeutic.
There is a point when watching someone's pain becomes the directly opposite of entertainment. The New York reunion was more than just women hashing out personal problems that have plagued their friendships; they were exploring the definition of reality television, exploring the questions the show itself asks when delving into the lives of these elite New York women. Putting these women together in the same room for a few hours, simply to talk, is the making of a pressure cooker that yields very interesting results. Some may view the show, and especially the bloated reunion footage, as pure shlock. I believe the show has stumbled upon something very interesting, a dynamic that is suddenly exploring the boundaries of reality television itself. Satchels of gold, Bravo, for giving a rather sharp edge to a show that could be viewed simply as enjoyable trash.
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